Self-leadership vs. self-optimization: An interview
- Dr. Jessica Di Bella
- Feb 24
- 3 min read
Why is self-development not the same as self-optimization? How is personal development changing in the digital age? And are millennials really that eager for self-development and learning? This post is based on a podcast interview from July 2019. In this interview, I share insights from my coaching practice as well as experiences from my own personal development journey.
Jessica, what does self-development and self-improvement actually look like in the digital age?
First of all, I’d like to clarify that, for me, self-development does not equal self-improvement. In fact, I would never talk about self-improvement when referring to personal development. I would never tell anyone that they should “improve” themselves. We are already perfect. It's more about how we lead our lives.
In my view, personal development is about a) learning about yourself and others, b) living your interests and strengths in your private and professional life, and c) being able to cope with adversity.
All of this serves the purpose of living a fulfilled life and being able to bring more happiness into the lives of others.
That sounds intriguing. How can you get there if not through self-improvement?
Some of you may be familiar with Managing Oneself by Peter Drucker. In this essay, he argues that we shouldn’t focus on our weaknesses. Improving weaknesses only ever gets you to average. Instead, he suggests consistently focusing on and building your strengths. When you truly build on your strengths, that’s where your superpower emerges.
What do you think has changed in the digital age?
Some things have changed – particularly the accessibility of psychological knowledge, the availability of coaching tools through AI, and an ongoing shift in society toward greater openness and even curiosity when it comes to personal development.
But beyond that, I’m afraid not that much has changed. We human beings still share one fundamental goal: living a life of high quality – whatever that means for each individual. Love, meaning, impact…
The young generation today has so many options. Don’t you see that as a challenge?
It definitely is a challenge. After finishing my PhD, I had countless options – and yet I felt as though I had no options at all. At Stanford, this phase is referred to as the “dissertation drought.” I was free to go anywhere in the world. But where? And what should I do professionally? Academia? Business? I was deeply unhappy with this state of complete freedom of choice. It's typical of developmental stages in our lives: transition phases are never easy. What you need in moments like these is self-leadership – the ability to lead yourself to the next level.
What skills do you need in order to lead yourself?
The first skill you need is self-reflection: being able and willing to truly see yourself as you are – your core self. Honest self-reflection is incredibly important; it is, in fact, the foundation of everything else. The second crucial ingredient is values. As soon as you know your true values and genuinely live by them, life begins to offer you the experiences you need to feel fulfilled and happy.
How does self-leadership work in practice?
It’s about knowing your strengths and weaknesses, your core values and goals – and then building a vision for yourself. Where do you want to be? What do you want to have in your life? How do you want to feel? Create these emotions throughout your body and mind so that your entire being reflects the feelings you aspire to. And then act: What steps do you need to take to move into a new position, change career direction, or build a happy relationship?
Studies show that millennials have higher motivation to learn, stronger proactive personalities, and higher levels of consciousness than previous generations. Do you think the importance of personal development has changed with younger generations?
Yes, absolutely. The importance of self-development has grown because people today are more inclined to reflect on themselves. From a Maslow’s hierarchy of needs perspective, many of us are operating at a higher level than previous generations. Earlier generations often faced more economic uncertainty, and it wasn’t uncommon for people from Generation X or the Baby Boomer generation to begin deep self-reflection during a midlife crisis, often between the ages of 48 and 55.
What has changed is not only wealth, but also collective wisdom. There is vastly more knowledge available and accessible today. Psychology, for example, is a relatively young science, and yet its core insights are now available to almost everyone – through books, podcasts, journals, and the internet. This is a luxury I’m deeply grateful for.
Thank you to Julia Thielemann and Sara Sommerfeld from HWR Berlin for recording the interview and sharing the transcript.
For individual 1:1 coaching, please check out www.jessicadibella.de/coaching and contact me via E-Mail.
